THE BELIEVER

CHILD

Caitlyn

Stamford, Connecticut

A storm is brewing, a storm of uncertainty, the uncertainty as to the gender and identity of the in utero sibling of three-year-old child Caitlyn. The appearance, in three months, of the sibling of child Caitlyn will alter the demographic status of child Caitlyn. Caitlyn will become the middle child. Alleged difficulties of middle children are widely hypothesized, of course, but Caitlyn herself will not dignify the subject by addressing it directly. There are more important subjects to address, for example, cartoon characters of varying levels of notoriety. For example: Teamo Supremo. For example: Dora the Explorer. For example: Pooh and assorted Aristocats. On the day of the interview, Caitlyn is located underneath the dining room table, having upended the briefcase of her grandfather, including antacids, ibuprofen tablets, and herbal tea bags, having emptied this briefcase onto the floor, subsequent to which she tears open many of the teabags, and revels in a general pulled-apartness of these items, especially in the pulled-apartness of important papers belonging to her grandfather. When invited by her mother, Colleen, she of the wonderfully dry wit, to offer apology, the interview subject addresses her grandfather thus: “I’m sorry. I was just being Caitlyn.”

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—Rick Moody

Rick Moody is the author of, most recently, The Black Veil and Demonology.