A monthly advice column
This month: guest columnist Judd Apatow
I was talking on the phone with my brother not long ago, and while we were saying our good-bye I told him I loved him. He seemed hesitant to return the words. I haven’t said it again since, but it’s been on my mind. What’s wrong with telling your brother you love him? Could it be some deep-seated homophobia?
Feeling Unloved in Alaska
Dear Feeling Unloved in Alaska?
I am confused. Are these questions for real or is this column a joke? If this is real, I would say that it is often hard for siblings to connect after so many difficult years of rivalry and competition for the love of their parents. If this is a fake letter then I am not sure what to say. Am I supposed to make a joke?
My neighbor’s dog has been leaving “surprises” on my front lawn. I’ve complained about it repeatedly, but he refuses to curb his dog or, at the very least, keep the mutt on a leash. Legally, does this give me the right to take a dump on his property?
Ready to Poop
Dear Ready to Poop?
This one feels like a fake letter. The question is not very funny or unique. I thought the Believer was written by smart, literate people. Or maybe they are so smart that they don’t know how to write dirty questions and jokes. I wonder if these questions are lame as some sort of ironic comment on how the magazine feels about me.
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