Dear Sedaratives:

A guy I’ve been dating for the past month told me he wants to be “friends with benefits.” What does this mean? What should I tell him?

Too Friendly For My Own Good
Phoenix, Ariz.

Dear Too:

Tell him that’s cool with you. By “benefits,” he means he’d most likely like to make monthly deposits into your bank account. By “friends,” he means you’ll accept those checks. But no matter what you do, do not ever have sex with him again. Unless you are in the same place as he is. In which case, just watch Oprah tomorrow. Odds are, she’ll answer all your questions.

Bob