January 2012

Musin’s and Thinkin’s

A Monthly Stroll Down Folksy Byways

with Jack Pendarvis

So you are on your deathbed! There is no need to make a big thing about it. We have all been on our deathbeds from time to time. As always, the important thing is to have fun.

A cheery display of bright flowers is a must for today’s busy deathbed occupant on the go.

Have you ever heard about “the language of flowers”? Every flower has a specific meaning, be it a fresh, dewy jonquil, the insouciant snapdragon, or the lowly daisy. A red rose represents some nutty thing, while a white rose means something else entirely. At least that’s what someone told me, but I don’t believe it. It doesn’t make any sense! The last thing you need right now is a maniac filling your head with crazy ideas. Or is that exactly what you need? It might make for a refreshing change of pace on an otherwise gloomy afternoon on your deathbed.

After all, our hypothetical maniac is just trying to feed his family like everyone else. How can we presume to judge him, with his fixed grin and wildly flashing eyes? Are you too good to hang out with a gibbering fiend? Well, pardon me, your ladyship. True, his manner of dress and habits may strike us as odd. Perhaps when he drops a pencil he prefers—rather than bending over—to pick it up with his prehensile toes. So what? We all have our foibles.

We hope you enjoy this excerpt.

To read the full piece, please visit our store to purchase a copy of the magazine.

Jack Pendarvis has written three books.

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